A couple of days ago I wrote a post on being insecure and why to stop being insecure. That post was about how I did not understand how people can be insecure with themselves when they are in a good relationship.

In a perfect world people would be able to turn off insecurities like a light switch. This is not the case for most insecure people.  Insecurities derive from people’s pasts and the past is hard to forget about. This post is going to reflect what I think the outcome of relationships are when you are in one with someone who is insecure.

When Your Boyfriend Is Insecure

He will get jealous all the time, and he will always want to hangout with you when you go places. This is not okay. You need to have time apart from each other. The bottom line here is that he needs to be able to trust you.

If your boyfriend is already insecure, and you have lied to him about several things already, you might as well just throw in the towel. You as a girl who would like some independence to do things on your own will always now feel guilty for doing so.

Since you probably will not just throw in the towel quite yet in your relationship, I suggest you talk to him and tell him that his insecurities are really bothering you. That you need to be able to hang out with your friends. Tell him that it is not like you are going to be out looking for other guys, and that he is the center of your world.

Guys like to be told things logically and up front like this. Although I am not insecure with myself in anyway – if I were I would want  my girlfriend to lay it out like that for me. It would make an insecure person feel better.

When Your Girlfriend Is Insecure

A relationship will have it’s good times and it’s bad. Hopefully the good times out way the bad but I do not want to go off into tangents here. You are reading this to find out what to say to your girlfriend when when she is crying. So here are the 7 suggestions.

1. “Your eyes look pretty… even when you cry.”

• Saying a little compliment like this can go a long way. It could even make her laugh which leads me to the next thing you can say to your girlfriend when she is crying.

2. “I farted so loud over in that corner… I wonder if anyone could smell it.”

• You do not necessarily need to say this, just something along the lines of this. Something that will grab the attention of your girlfriend to prevent her from crying, and to get her laughing and maybe even talk about something else.

3. “Remember the time when you told me that…”

• Change the subject. Always a good way to get someone to stop crying.

4. “Is there anything I can do to make you cheer up? Do you want to go get some ice cream?”

• Believe it or not this works really well. Showing her that you care and you want her to be happy makes her feel wanted therefore will cheer up.

So many times my friends and I have been in relationships where either themselves or their partner is insecure. This could be for many reasons of which I will explain. Before you start (although you probably have) calling your partner insecure and telling your friends that he/she is insecure let me go over my own brief definition of the word.

When someone is insecure in a relationship it means that someone has doubts or fear in that relationship. In other words someone who is not confident.

Who wants to be with someone who is not confident, and is showing doubts about a relationship? You may be surprised but even I have dated someone who was extremely insecure.  I’m sure most of you readers have also or are currently dating someone who is too.

It’s hard to get someone to be secure again when they are insecure. I felt really hopeless in that relationship because no matter how much I complimented my ex, and no matter how much I did for her she still had those same insecure feelings.

Since nothing was getting better in our relationship, one day I came up with a thought about why she was having insecurity issues. Maybe it was because she did not trust me. That had to be it. I had not done anything that would ever break that bond of trust with her, but maybe because of a passed experience she had in her life she was not letting herself trust me.

Communication Is Key

You are in love with a girl and you are afraid to say it!  I wrote this post to explain to people how to say I love you for the first time.  For some of you it is really easy to do, but for many others, it is really difficult.  Telling someone that you love them is one of the most important things you can ever do.

I have put together 5 steps of which you can follow to help you get these 3 words off your chest.

1. Define Love (How To Tell A Girl I Love You)

Have you talked to her about the L word? Find out from herself what she thinks about it.  Gather hints from her to see if she is having those feelings for you.

My definition of love is to have feelings and passion for someone that words can not explain.  You can use my definition if she asks you what you think love is but I recommend that you come up with your own.  Chances are that you already have a definition of your own if you are feeling those feelings in your relationship.

If you absolutely still feel weird  about telling her you love her then ask her friends.  Do not do this unless you must because her friends (if they are good friends) will probably tell her everything that you say.

Ask her friends what your girlfriend thinks of the word love.  Ask them what she thinks it means and if your girlfriend has said it in the past.  It’s a really important word and a special feeling.  Essentially you would not be trying to tell her friends that you are going to tell their friend that you love her, you are basically just trying to gather information.

Knowing all of this information is great but if you are in love, you are not going to change how you feel. Even if you are getting bad vibes from the situation. Its time to get these three words off of your chest and let her know how you feel!

2. Find A Place And A Time (How To Tell A Girl I Love You)